✨ Don’t Think Your Feel Away

Why clarity, not control, shapes the conversation with your horse.

I recently stumbled upon the saying “Don’t think your feel away” on Facebook—and it instantly resonated with me.It reminded me of so many moments in horse training where I realized that overthinking doesn’t bring more connection… it gets in the way of it.

There’s a fine line between thoughtfulness and overthinking. Between refining our awareness—and losing it altogether by trying too hard to get it right.I’ve seen it so often in myself and in my students: the moment we start thinking our feel away.

We feel something… but instead of staying with it, we analyze it.We sense a shift… but instead of riding it like a wave, we pause and try to manage it.We want to offer clarity… but instead, we over-cue, over-correct, over-do.

And the result?We lose the most important ingredient: feel.

🌿 Alignment of Intention, Feel, and Body Language

When we overthink or overdo, we often override what’s already there.But horses are incredibly sensitive. They pick up on our slightest energy, breath, or intention. They don’t need more—they need clearer.

And clearer doesn’t mean louder.It means that the inner picture is sharp. The inner feeling is anchored.That the body speaks with a calm, patient, awaiting tone that gives the horse room to think, respond, and explore.

But here’s the key:That inner picture and feeling must match what our body is actually doing.

Because when, for example, our seat says “wait,” our legs say “go,” and our hand says “not yet”—we create noise.We might have the best intention, we might deeply want to support the horse……yet the sum of our aids becomes contradictory.And that confuses the horse far more than silence ever could.

And it’s not just about the aids we give—it’s about how we carry ourselves.When we live too much in our heads, constantly overthinking, we often slow down unintentionally—while we’re actually asking our horse to go more forward.But hey… what should they mirror?We hold the picture of forward in our mind, but our body tells a different story.Tension builds in our body. Our breath becomes shallow. Even our eyes can lose softness and become fixated on a goal.And this is just one small example of many.Because the way we carry ourselves—our energy, our gaze, our breath—all play into the conversation. The horse reads it all.

We must never underestimate eye pressure in the dialogue with our horse.It can push them away, close the door, or invite defensiveness—without us saying a word.

So awareness is key:To feel not just the horse—but ourselves.To notice if our picture and body match.To soften our gaze. To keep breath flowing.To let our presence say, “I’m here. I’m listening. You’re safe to explore.”

🌀 Doing more is never the solution.

In fact, less is usually the answer.Less pushing. Less correcting. Less trying to make it happen.

When I do less—but hold a strong, clear inner picture and allow my energy to radiate with inviting presence—that’s when the real magic begins.The horse has space to take responsibility. To offer something of their own. To grow into the movement, the idea, the dialogue.

Because only when it feels like the horse’s idea……does it start to feel effortless.

🐎 So don’t think your feel away.

Stay present. Stay quiet.Have a crystal-clear intention, but don’t force your horse into your picture.

Instead, shape the moment with breath, posture, softness, patience.And then—wait for your horse to join the picture with their own thought.That’s where real communication begins.